just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
Randomize
