This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize
