Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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