I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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