I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Randomize
