we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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