Screwed.edu
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
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