I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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