I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
