They should really pass out barf bags in church
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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