Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
not ubering you a puppy
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Randomize
