maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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