he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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