Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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