idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I love you. Go after that dick
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
