you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
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