Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
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