I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize
