and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
