You're completely useless in the revolution.
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
I am available for nakedness
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
