why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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