Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
Randomize
