Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
