Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
vagina is talking i cant
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Randomize
