I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
