I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
