For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
