I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
