We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Randomize
