I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Randomize