If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize
