whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I need to calm my uterus...
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize
