i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
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