Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
