I should be sponsored by Trojan
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
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