i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
Randomize
