just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Randomize
