It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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