they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
honey bunches of taint.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Randomize
