It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
