and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
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