i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
