NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
