Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Everclear isn't food dammit
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Randomize
