Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
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