is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize