You're so nebulous sometimes
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize
