Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize