Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
