K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
