K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
i think i just lost a toe
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize