In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
