Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Randomize
